First, in the news...my friend "busted" out of the county lock-up on Thursday morning, and was already out on the town Friday night. Seems like he has both a lot to catch up on and to prepare for in advance...In advance of thirty days of house arrest. Yes, the judge certainly wanted to make an impression on the little scofflaw. No lowjack, just confined to the house from 7 a.m. to 7 p.m. every gosh-darn day for thirty days. They have an automated system dialing his phone at random times, and once the call comes, he has so many seconds to call a probation person and let them know that he was at home.

And, yes, the system does have caller i.d., so having a snitch at home reach him goodness knows where is not an option.

Friday, he had plans with his secret boyfriend...and I mean that this boy friend is so double-naught secret that the whole gang of us know. Of course, the Secret Boy Friend (who has a boyfriend of his own, off away on business this weekend) doesn't know that we all know. He thinks that he's been very careful and (shhhhh!) discreet. He presented the evening out as an altruistic thing to me...you know, showing the guy a nice night out since he has been confined to basketball and Soultrain for 15 days...and, yes, he wanted all of the scoop on life on the inside.

And I won't go there with the obvious next line.

I've been feeling a little creaky lately. For some reason, all of the women in my family have bad hips...we're like a bad line of German Shepherds with hip dysplasia. This pops up every now and then for me, and it popped up Thursday. Rest is really the only way to get it gone, but I have been busy at work and unable to take any time off for recovery. Plus, I have to rack up the extra time because I am going out of town this weekend, to meet my boyfriend's parents...as if that is not nerve-wracking enough without have to deal with a jacked-up hip. "Mom and Dad, this is my gimpy girlfriend." Wonderful first impression there, boy howdy. He also gets to meet my parents, which in many ways is more stressful...my Dad is a little, um...judgemental.

I almost missed the whole "spring forward" thing, after I was preaching the time to everyone at work all week long. If I had not had to make a potty trip at 3:54 a.m. I'm sure that I would still be sleeping right now, and late for work. Not good. I am very happy about the whole daylight savings thing, because I am able to do stuff when I get home from work, and not in the dark, either.

Well, I guess that I need to hit the showers and get ready for a (yawn) long day at work. I think that there are more than enough there today, so I can prepare for a week-long audit of my office, set to commence tomorrow a.m. I love having people examine every crevice and cranny of my business...and you don't even get a cigarette or a nice floral arrangement when it's all done...

No matter what I did today, or who I spoke with, men seemed to be the issue of the day. Let's see...I had to explain to two managers that the transportation issues with their employees revolved around the fact that their husbands do not "allow" them to have driver's licenses. Then I get home and a friend has e-mailed me that the skeezoid that she was seeing a while back (while he continued to share a home with his girlfriend) is calling her again, so they can "meet" and "catch up." Jerk. And my boyfriend? MIA. I called when I got home from work, and got the machine. I can't for the life of me imagine where he could be at this time of night...and the mind, she do wander...

Are we sure that they are the same species as us girls? Really?

Ah, I'm just so freakin' cranky today...work was a real downer today. I wasn't able to get anything done because I had a constant problem parade in my office. One person even parked himself in a chair as I tried to cram Chinese food down my throat so I wouldn't pass out from low blood sugar. I'm going to have to be more careful about skipping the caffeine, too, because I found myself yawning at the most inappropriate moments...like my performance evaluation. I think that the only thing worse would have been for my boss to yawn during the evaluation.

Three days til the jailbreak...I can't wait to hear the real life tales from Cellblock C.

Only four more days until my scofflaw friend gets out of the pokey. Oh, could I get many, many jokes from that...like, I could say something about him becoming some hairy convict's bitch, but (a) he'd probably like it and (b) let's not get into rap sheets, okay? His is getting longer than my arm as we speak. It was just all so bizarre...like an episode of Twilight Zone...there was the stop for (ahem) driving too slow, and one minute he's talking to the judge about why he violated his parole and the next he's sporting a bright new orange jumpsuit, courtesy the county. True, true...he was violating his parole. And there was that DUI. Not to mention the previous probation violation. (sigh)

He's put the gris-gris on visitors. Was it because he was embarrassed to be eating with plastic utensils? Being forced to play (horrors) basketball with the "general population?" Or that orange is just not his color? Quite the contrary...it was because they do not have mirrors in jail, and he was concerned about the condition of his coif. Apparently, they do not provide Aveda products in county lock-up.

And all of those taxes we pay! (sigh)